By Dick Cummins
Dick is a graduate of the Iowa Writers’ Workshop and a regular contributor to this blog. This is an excerpt from his unpublished memoir.
It was a Sunday morning in 1950 and I was seven years old. It was Mother’s Day too and my father was in the garage working on our Crosley. He did this on Sunday mornings, displacement repairs I guess, so I wouldn’t bother asking again why he wasn’t going to church with us.
I hated church because it was so boring but Sunday School at my mother’s Old Monterey Lutheran wasn’t so bad. This was because Miss Persephone, who was also my pretty tap teacher, read us Bible stories. Some were really interesting even if they didn’t make sense sometimes. For instance, I really liked Noah and The Big Flood.
But when I asked Miss Persephone about Noah letting “… every creeping thing of the earth” onto his ark, and did that include two poisonous rattlesnakes that would bite everybody, or Black Widow spiders or two big ole dirty garbage rats like the ones Animal Control shot down by the canneries, she shrugged.
“If they weren’t specifically mentioned Nicky, how would anyone know?” was her answer.
I liked Jonah and The Big Fish too, except I had more questions yet, like wasn’t the “big fish” a whale? And how did Jonah get swallowed without being chewed up and when he was in this fish’s belly for three days, wouldn’t he have got digested some? Miss P thanked me for my questions, but because she still had to read The Prodigal Son before class was over, could I please ease up on the interrogations.
“If you want to know more about Bible stories Nicky, why don’t you ask your mother when you get home?”
That sounded like a good idea at the time, but …
“Why doesn’t God have a birthday like Jesus, Mommy?”
“Because He always was and He always will be.”
“But everybody has a birthday, don’t they?”
“Not God.”
“Who came before God?”
“No one because He was first.”
“That doesn’t make sense.”
“Everything has to start with a beginning so it was God. Everything and everybody came after Him.”
“But I really want God to have a birthday.”
“Because …?”
“Because God’s birthday would be more important than Christmas so I would get even more presents!”
“Aren’t you getting to be the little thinker!”
“And do you know that Daddy doesn’t think Jesus is really coming back?”
“Somehow it doesn’t surprise me, Kiddo.”
“He says Jesus coming back to life is like the sign one of his men told him about in a bar that said ‘free beer tomorrow’.”
“Your father says a lot of things.”
“I don’t know what it means – what he said.”
“When do you talk to Daddy about these opinions of his Nicky?”
“When we play catch.”
“So much for promising he wouldn’t get into this until you’re older,” my mother said, but to someone else, not me.
“I’m almost eight. Isn’t that older?”
”Not old enough, Honey.”
“So how come some daddies don’t have to go to church? Joey Oleda’s daddy doesn’t go either and he’s a cop.”
“Policeman Nick. Be respectful.”
“How come they get to stay home and I can’t? It’s not fair. Church is boring.”
“You’re beginning to sound too much like your father Nicky, and it’s not a pretty picture for your immortal soul.”
“What happens to people if they don’t go to church?”
“I’m told they can’t get into heaven Honey. You wouldn’t want that would you?”
“I guess not, but if Daddy won’t be there where will he go?”
“To a very warm place and roast for all eternity. That’s what Pastor Miller says.”
“What’s eternity?”
“Forever.”
“How about this Mommy—if Daddy can’t go to heaven why don’t we all stay home from church so we can be together in the warm place?”
“You’re just full of ideas this morning aren’t you? But we’ll stick with church for now and then you can be with me in Heaven some day too, okay?”
“If you say so, I guess.”
“Good to know Honey. Now Mommy’s getting a headache so why don’t you go outside and play like a good boy?”
“Can I go tell Daddy he’ll be roasting forever if he doesn’t start going to church with us?”
“Won’t do any good Nicky. I’ve mentioned it more times than I can count already and he…” Before she could finish, my father walked in from the garage, wiping his hands.
“How was church?”
“Reassuring as always Russell. Nicky tells me you’ve been discussing your opinions about religion a lot, opinions you said you wouldn’t share.”
“He asked me a few questions is all Elizabeth.”
“Thought you were going to leave certain ideas alone until after his confirmation? And the Second Coming of our Lord and Savior is like free beer tomorrow? Please tell me what gets into you Russell?”
“Can I just stay home with you Daddy and play with the car next Sunday too?” I asked, just before my mother could say whatever she was boiling to say.
“Ask your mother Nick. She’s the boss of faith instruction around here. I promised her I’d butt out.”
“That’s not fair Daddy because you know what she’ll say.”
“Sure, but for now you have to remember that until you’re sixteen—Moms know best about church and Jesus. Especially when it’s around Mother’s Day Nicky.”
It turned out that the next week I was almost glad I had to go to Sunday School because Miss Persephone read the best story ever. It was called “Stranger on the Shore” or “The Story of Doubting Thomas.” I liked it because when Simon Peter got fed up waiting around the Sea of Galilee for proof that Jesus had come back to life and when he didn’t show up Simon Peter said: “I’m going fishing.”
I told my father about this while we were playing catch and it made him smile.
“Maybe we would have some luck if we go down and fish for sand dabs under Fisherman’s Wharf,” he said, heading into the garage for our poles.
It was one of our favorite things to do and my mother loved frying the tiny sole, no bigger than your hand, until they were browned and tender.
We crawled along the catwalk under the wharf with a paper bag of shrimp we bought at Pete’s Fish Market for bait, the ten foot deep water swelling gently in and out, so clear over the sand we could see the little sand dabs fluttering as they dug into the bottom. This kind of fishing was so much fun because we could walk a dime of shrimp right up to the flat scissor mouths of the little fish, then twitch the rod up to set the hook and catch twenty or thirty in an hour.
It was our secret there under Fisherman’s Wharf, the smell of creosoted supports like telephone poles, hissing as the swells bent around them because they were covered with barnacles and the green lettuce leaves of sea weed that got exposed when the tide was out. That’s when the acid, stinging sea smell was so strong it almost burned my eyes but I loved it and didn’t care because it smelled like doing fun things with my father.
Walking back off the wharf to our Crosley, our catch wrapped in newspaper, I knew that if my father couldn’t get into to heaven, then I wasn’t going either. Because just like my mother said—“I was beginning to sound just like him”—and like he said too, Moms know best—especially around Mother’s Day.
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